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How to Get Out of the Comparison Trap

comparing yourself to others

We bring to you how to stop comparing yourself to others

“His business has grown so fast, he is so lucky. How did he do that?”

“They always look so happy together.”

“She has the best abs, I can never get there.”

Have one or all of these comments crossed your mind lately? Chances are, yes. And if so, you are living in an unfortunate state of comparisonitis, i.e. the never-ending cycle of looking at your achievements (or lack of) next to someone else’s. What does all this comparing do? Well, it leaves you unfulfilled, unhappy and unsatisfied. It can make you feel miserable about your life and exhausted from constantly trying to live up to an image or ideal that likely isn’t even real.

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When it comes to building a business, comparing yourself to others is a quick path to becoming stuck and burnt out. It’s natural to look to your competitors to understand their successes, failures and where they stand in the market, but don’t get carried away. There are more than enough opportunities for everyone. Worrying about what they have that you don’t does nothing to them. It will only hurt you.

The good news is, you can break free from this destructive cycle by taking small steps every day to grow and retrain your brain to view life through a different lens; to focus less on the bad and more on the good in your life.

Here are four steps to help put a stop to Comparing yourself to others and begin leading a life and career of true fulfillment.

1. Become aware of your triggers, especially social media.

Awareness is key to breaking the habit of comparing yourself to others. One of the biggest playgrounds for comparison is social media, which you’re likely using as a distraction from focusing on the true trigger of your comparisonitis. Begin to notice whether you reach for your phone because you’re feeling lonely or bored. Are you avoiding that tough conversation with a loved one? Social-media engagement can be your best friend when growing your business and connecting with your community, or it can become your worst enemy, leaving you to feel worse about yourself. It’s all about how you use it.

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Set up a time that is solely dedicated to being on social media while in a positive mindset. Avoid the random check-in when you’re waiting in line at a coffee shop or sitting in traffic. Before signing on, tell yourself, “I am going to find inspiration here.”  When you see those fitness models working out and successful entrepreneurs traveling the world, decide to view it as a source of motivation to keep you on your path, not derail you from it. Never forget, social media is a snapshot into someone’s life. You are viewing one perfect moment captured in an imperfect day. There is a story and journey behind it all.

2. Stay in your zone of genius.

You can’t compare your day one to someone else’s, and you can’t compare your weaknesses to someone’s strengths. I wouldn’t want to measure my cooking abilities against a Michelin Star winner or my weightlifting skills against those of an Olympic athlete, and you shouldn’t either. Keep your focus on your very own zone of genius. Find the specific aspects of your business and experience that really make you shine, then focus on making those one percent better every day. We all have our own special gifts and natural talents. The key is to understand your own uniqueness and find support for, or delegate, the other parts.

If you aren’t sure of your zone of genius, ask yourself, “What work do I do that never feels like work?” Often times, what you’re naturally best at is something that feels easy, so easy you don’t even realize it’s a gift. Reach out to your close friends, family, and coworkers for feedback, because this information can be your biggest asset.

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3. Take action, even if it isn’t perfect.

Comparisonitis can be a quick road to paralysis. Before you know it, hours have gone by where you sat snuggled up on the couch, looking at and thinking about how easy it is for everyone else. When you notice yourself falling into this pattern, get up and move. Movement shifts the energy around and within you, even changing your thought patterns.

Excellence in business doesn’t happen overnight. It requires a great deal of commitment, dedication and passion to reach the high standards you have probably placed on yourself. That’s why it’s all about the little actions that will one day allow you to look back and realize how far you’ve come.

4. Take technology breaks.

Live fully in the moment, because that is where the most joy and gratitude is. Even though I engage with a beautiful online community, I love to spend days entirely offline where I can be completely connected with my husband, my close friends or my creativity in my business. Pick a day each month to turn off your phone and free yourself completely.

If you are thinking, “I can’t let my community down by not being present. I can’t walk away from business for a whole day,” then consider how rejuvenated, focused and fresh you will be when you return to them. When you take care of yourself, you are better prepared to take care of others. On these days, I also love building a list of all the people and things I love in my life, and the qualities I love in myself. Try making a voice recording of your list and listening to it every day for the rest of the month.

Making comparisons is a natural, human tendency, and that is okay, but you can use these steps to help reduce your comparisonitis. And when it does pop back up, don’t judge yourself too harshly, because you are already amazing in your own unique and beautiful way. Bringing yourself back to that realization is what sets you up for success.

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Self Improvement

Betting Strategy Guide for Three Card Poker

Card Poker

Three Card Poker is different to any other variant of poker and one that has continued to grow in popularity over time with casino players all around the world.

The main difference is that this game is not played against other players at a table, but it is played against the dealer instead. This means bettors will only ever need to think about the cards that they have and the ones that the dealer has, rather than having to be concerned with a number of different other playing hands that are involved.

Three Card Poker is one of the easiest games to play and does not take too long to pick up and learn for those who do not have any idea about it. Here is a quick guide to help explain the rules and provide you with a typical strategy that can be used when playing this game at a casino.

How to play Three Card Poker

In order to start playing Three Card Poker, players will need to place a wager. There are two options available:

Ante bet – This is the bet that is placed against the dealer’s hand, with the objective of trying to obtain the highest hand possible in regards to poker rank.

Pair plus – This bet is where players will aim to make a hand of a pair or better with their hand. The dealer’s hand becomes irrelevant, but the house edge will increase significantly.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, players will receive a total of three playing cards, as will the dealer once the opening bet has been placed. Players can now look at the cards that they have been handed and choose whether to play or to fold.

If they choose to fold, the game will end with the dealer taking the initial bet, whilst playing the hand will require a “Play” bet to be wagered that matches the ante bet placed.

After the bet has been placed, the playing hands will be revealed by both the player and the dealer to reveal an outcome.

If the dealer’s hand is Jack-high or worse, then their hand will not qualify and players will receive their bets back.

If the dealer has a hand that is Queen-high or better, they will then play their hand which will then be ranked in comparison to the players. If the player wins, they will receive the equivalent to the bets they placed, on top of their initial stake. If they lose, they lose everything they wagered on that turn.

How do the hands rank?

It would be wise to know how the playing card hands rank before playing Three Card Poker. This is the following breakdown:

Straight Flush – 3 cards of the same suit and consecutive values

3 of a Kind – 3 cards that are the same value

Straight – 3 cards that increase consecutively

Flush – 3 cards of the same suit

Pair – a combination of 2 cards that have the same value.

High Card: this is where no sequences of the above can be formed, but a card such as a royal can help improve the hand.

Typically, the following payouts will be rewarded for the following hands:

Straight Flush: 5:1 (40:1 for Pair Plus betting)

Three of a Kind: 4:1 (30:1)

Straight: 1:1 (6:1)


To play Three Card Poker effectively, it would be worthwhile learning one particular strategy to ensure that you have the best chance of obtaining a win when playing against a casino dealer.

This strategy involves remembering just one combination of cards to base the decision that you will make when deciding whether to place a bet or fold.

If you have a hand that consists of a Queen, a Six and a Four or higher, then play. If you have anything else, then you should fold.

Another popular strategy that can be followed when playing Three Card Poker is to avoid using the Pair Plus bet that is available. As mentioned, although the payouts can be rather appealing if it is achieved, this bet will make the house edge increase significantly.

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Self Improvement

Playing in the Yard or How Did We Play in the Past

How to Improve the Mental Health of your Child

As we get older, we tend to look to our childhood as a perfect time in our lives. The expression “we were poor, but we were happy” is often heard. There were no computers or mobile phones, and not every home had a TV. Children had to make their entertainment, and many of the games they played have been forgotten. Playing games like jackpot bells in the yard when young can easily slots into these conversations.

Hide and Seek

If the yard is big enough and there are places to hide, this is a fun game. There would always be someone who found a place where no one could find them. One person has to close their eyes while others are hiding. The last one found is the winner of that round. For safety reasons, it may be best that younger children do not play this unsupervised – modern-day health and safety that would not have been considered during childhood. 

Blind Man’s Bluff

This is another game that may well fall foul of health and safety. The seeker is fitted with a blindfold and spun around while the others are playing the game run away. Once the games start, the others cannot move away again but only bend to avoid being tagged. The seeker moves around the yard, trying to find the children. This is also an ideal way to keep children quiet when parents want a little peace.

Simon Says

Simon says it is ideal when the yard is only small. One child is chosen to be Simon, and they give the instructions. Anything that starts, “Simon says,” is followed so, “Simon says hop on your left leg” is an order to be followed, whereas “hop on your left leg” should be ignored. Any child who carries out the latter order is out of the game.

Jump Rope

Two children take each end of the rope and begin to turn it. One child jumps into the middle and starts to skip. Sometimes it would be simply seeing how many times they could jump over the rope while for others, there were songs. In some cases, others would join in and all jump rope at the same time. Cinderella dress in Yella (yellow) was a popular song sung. The children sing a song about Cinderella and, at the end of it, start to count. A child jumps in and, on the number, jumps the rope. The one reaching the highest number wins.

Duck Duck Goose

All the children sit in a circle, and one is chosen to start. They walk around the outside of the circle and tap each child on the head as they pass and say, “duck.” They then pick one child and say “goose” as they tap them. That child then has to stand up and chase the first child around the circle and catch them before they reach the gap where they had been sitting. The one who does not make it is then the new chaser.

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Self Improvement

How to Improve the Mental Health of your Child

How to Improve the Mental Health of your Child

Most parents give  more attention to the physical  well being of their children  by giving them nutritious food, sending them for immunizations regularly, helping them with their school assignment among others, but they often neglect the mental health aspect of their responsibilities. The mental well being of a growing child is just as important and necessary as the physical well being and therefore deserves just as much attention as the physical. If you are a parent seeking how you can improve the mental health of your child, the rest of the article will show you how. Keep reading to find out.

Take good Care of your mental health.

Research shows that homes where parents have problems with their mental health, their children are at a higher risk of developing mental health problems as well.  As a parent, you need to be a model for your children, while growing up, children watch what their parents do and imitate. Develop good habits towards sleep, stress management, decision making so as to provide an enabling environment for your children to follow. Seek professional care when you notice changes in your sleep pattern, eating habits and decision making.

Give opportunity for Independence

While children depend on their parents for certain needs such as; food, clothing, safety and security, they sometimes need to be given the opportunity to do certain things for themselves. Always encourage your children to carry out certain task by themselves. Children should be allowed to wash their own clothes, dishes, and other minor tasks. This helps increase a sense of responsibility and confidence in the children. Do not be overly protective of your children

Play Together

How to Improve the Mental Health of your Child
Close up of a young family having a walk by the beach/ Credit: Gettyimages

For a child to be healthy both physically and mentally, the child needs o play. Take time to play with your children. There are several exercise you can play with your children including; planks, squats, jogging can help improve the physical well being of the child. Sand tray therapy is a well known exercise than can improve the mental well being of both children and adults. It is also used by counselors   when dealing with issues of trauma or abuse.  It improves the creative ability of both children and adults.

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Build a Parent Child Relationship

As a parent, the best gift you can give to your family is by spending time with them. Make out time for your children. Assist them with their home works; take them out occasionally for dinner, games, gardens etc. Also allow your children to make friends with other members of the family and neighbors. Social cohesion plays a key role in improving the mental well being of children.

In conclusion, Always protect your children, show them you love and care for them and watch out for warning sign of mental illness or disorders as early detection is a key to good prognosis.

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